You know the drill. You want to lose some weight, stat. Your friend lost 10lbs in 3 weeks on (whatever diet is hot at the moment), so you figure you’ll give it a try.
You start your diet, follow the rules, count all the things you are supposed to count, restrict in all the right ways, and cut out all the foods deemed bad by your new diet. You lose a few lbs and think it must be working, this will be the one that finally works.
Then, you start thinking about all those foods you aren’t allowed to eat, like all the time. You stop going out with your friends because you just can’t or you used up all your points and you’ll be having broth for dinner, or you are too stressed about the thought of having to navigate a menu or be that person at the restaurant. It’s easier to just stay home and eat your steamed broccoli.
You were going so strong in the beginning, super motivated, committed, losing some weight, and then that slows down, waaaaay down, and maybe stops completely. You are discouraged. So-and-So is still shedding weight like it’s going out of style, but you’ve got nothing. You start restricting a little more, working out a little harder, hoping that will do the trick. And maybe it does for a week or 2, and then it stops again.
So now, you’ve lost a few lbs, can’t seem to lose any more, you’re stressed, discouraged, and annoyed at What’s-Her-Face because she’s still magically losing weight and you’re not.
You say screw it, give me all the carbs, bring on the french fries, let me dip them in some ice cream and throw in the towel because it’s just not working any more. There must be something wrong with me because this diet doesn’t work.
You go back to your old ways, gain all the weight back, and probably some more, and are right back where you started. Some time passes and you see that someone else is losing weight on the (enter new diet here), so you figure you might as well give it a try. Maybe this will be the one that actually works.
And here we go again.
Sound familiar?
Here’s the problem, restrictive diets just don’t work in the long run for a number of reasons. Here are some of those reasons.
1. They aren’t sustainable. Cutting out huge food groups or restricting calories can’t last forever. I mean, if you are ok with never eating a carbohydrate again, more power to ya, but I find way too much joy in a warm, fresh soft pretzel from the farmer’s market to never eat one again.
Life is going to happen, and you are most likely going to have to deviate from that strict diet at some point. There are going to be holidays, birthdays, nights out with friends, dinners with drinks, cookies and ice cream. Food is fuel, yes, but food is also fun and brings a sense of comfort and joy. It’s much more freeing to fuel your body well and find a healthy relationship with food than it is to just cut it off completely and never call it again.
2. Restricting too much slows down your metabolism. Pair that with over-exercising and you’ve got a recipe for disaster. If our bodies were just simple math equations like calories out > calories in = happiness and weight loss and we could all stick to a 1200 calorie diet and lose weight and keep it off forever, then we wouldn’t be having this conversation.
Our bodies are much more complex than that. In fact, when you restrict too much, you actually slow down your metabolism. Our bodies are so smart. They need a certain amount of fuel to work efficiently. When you are not fueling enough, your body starts to think, “Well, I have a lot of work to do, but I don’t have enough fuel to get it done, so I should probably hold on to what I have just in case.” Very smart.
Then, you start working out harder on top of not eating enough and your body just puts on the breaks. You can’t continue to restrict calories forever. When you are fueling properly, your body is happy, it feels safe, it knows it will have enough fuel to do its job so it can let go of the stores that it has – aka, shed some weight.
Think of it like putting gas in your car. You have to drive 100 miles. So, you fill your tank with enough gas to get you 100 miles. You aren’t going to fill it with 50 miles worth of gas and expect it to go 100 miles just because you think it should. That’s not how that works.
Your body is the same way. You can’t underfeed and under fuel your body and then ask it to do everything you want it to do in a day, and also lose weight, and let go of its stores, and build muscle, and recover from exercise, and perform at its best, and so on. Not gonna happen.
3. They mess with your mindset. When your focus is solely on the scale and losing weight, you set yourself up for disappointment. You feel great, you think your clothes might be fitting better, you really hope you lost 3lbs. You get on the scale and you only lost 1 and you are super bummed. But, you lost a pound, you are feeling better, and your clothes are fitting better. Those are real things!!
Weight is a very fluid thing and can fluctuate, even within the day. There will be ups and downs and that’s ok. Instead of hyper focusing on the number on the scale, look at how your progress is trending. If you are heading in the right direction with some fluctuations here and there, then you are on the right track.
Also, when you are constantly on a diet – or off a diet, whatever the case may be that week - you are stuck in the dieting mentality. You on living in a cycle of restricting and depriving, becoming over hungry and hyper focusing on certain foods, giving in to “bad” foods and over eating them, feeling guilty about it and throwing in the towel only to start restricting once again because you feel like you failed.
Dieting Mentality
Rather than focusing on the scale and on the rules and restrictions of another diet, set your mind on creating healthy, sustainable changes that are realistic in your lifestyle. If your focus is on creating your healthiest self, then your choices will fall in line with that intention.
4. They don’t leave room for balance. Life is about balance. For a diet to be sustainable it has to take into account your reality. You have to make your diet (as in the things you eat, not the “diet” you are on at the moment), make sense in your reality. There has to be room for balance and mindful indulgence without guilt, stress, failure, negative self-talk, and setting the whole dieting cycle back in motion again. Balance is important and necessary for a healthy lifestyle to be sustainable.
5. They don’t teach you how to have a healthy relationship with food. Sure, you can follow the rules, cut things out of your diet, drink the shakes, and restrict calories to see some changes. Until you can’t anymore. Sure, some diets work. Until they don’t. Until you are back to old habits, back to being out of control and back to the cycle we talked about before.
Instead of starting another restrictive diet, maybe it’s time to try something a little different. Maybe it’s time to create a healthy relationship with food that allows you to find balance and peace of mind, to fuel your body the way it needs to be fueled, and to finally make healthy changes that last.